In this TENTH episode of the Best Life (Coach) Podcast, we are discussing a recent article by BLCC co-founder Melissa Byone on turning your weaknesses into strengths.

We all know there are things we can work on to improve our businesses and our lives. Keep reading to uncover the best ways of turning your weaknesses into strengths.

Check out the blog post here: https://bestlifecoachcollective.com/turning-your-weaknesses-into-strengths/

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Transcript:

Best Life Coach Collective 0:00
Intro (music by SHADOWFIGURE)

 

Melissa Byone 0:00
Welcome to the best life coach podcast. This week, we’re discussing ways that you can turn your weaknesses into strengths. We all know there are things we can work on to improve our business and our lives. Stay tuned to uncover the best ways of turning your weaknesses into strengths.

Sarah Mae 0:17
Are you ready to live your best life? And you’re in the right place.

Melissa Byone 0:25
Welcome to the best life coach podcast, where we discuss how you can live your best life

Stephanie Nelb 0:31
brought to you by the cofounders of the best life coach collective.

Melissa Byone 0:35
As they say, it takes a village

Stephanie Nelb 0:37
now welcome to yours. How’s it going? Guys? It’s been a while. Good. Yeah.

Sarah Mae 0:45
I know. longer than usual.

Melissa Byone 0:49
I know. I know. It’s been like, a little crazy. I spent a month back on the mainland. And now it’s back to normal life.

Sarah Mae 1:00
Nice.

Stephanie Nelb 1:02
Sounds like a fun trip must have been relaxing, being with family and recharging.

Melissa Byone 1:08
Yeah, yeah, picture was back to the grind, we go. And I wanted to share an article I recently wrote, or our online blog, check out this like go to like the DEF CON. And, and it’s all about turning your weaknesses and strikes. So I kind of just wanted to run it by you guys and see if you had any other tips to kind of add on with what I already have. Does that sound? Cool? I love it. Awesome. All right. So starting off at the beginning, turning weaknesses into strengths. The first thing I have is recognizing and accepting your weaknesses.

Sarah Mae 1:58
Mm hmm. Can you elaborate? Well,

Melissa Byone 2:05
I mean, how can you? How can you really work on something unless you can identify what it’s basically starting off at? So, first step, like I said, identify your weakness, just even just admitting to yourself, what you’re not good at, or what you find yourself avoiding, so that you can start working on it. I kind of think like, sometimes it’s hard for me to see what that might be. So reaching out to someone close to you, that might help you kind of figuring out what your weaknesses are. And you can you can start working on them.

Stephanie Nelb 2:51
Yeah, no, that’s great. And I think it’s so important. As someone that likes to approach situations like this with a growth mindset, I agree that it’s just so important to recognize in the first place that you know what you can improve. I’m also kind of seeing a flip side of this, not only is it great to recognize your weaknesses, but also to recognize your strengths, so that you know, kind of what to play off of, and maybe emphasize, depending on what you’re doing, you know, we don’t want to play to our strengths entirely. We want to be cultivating our weaknesses and turning them into strengths. But I think still playing off the strengths that we do have can also be really beneficial.

Sarah Mae 3:34
And I like how you’re mentioned, possibly talking to people in your life about what your strengths and weaknesses are. Because a lot of times when you ask someone to speak about their strengths and weaknesses, they have no idea what to answer. And it can be quite overwhelming when you have a block blockage like that. So getting some people that know you best to give you a list is a great idea. Yeah. And also is very important to also play to your strengths. As you were saying, Stephanie, I know that in education, there’s a lot of emphasis around understanding your learning style. And that has also been awesome, like, refuted in a lot of aspects because when, like new style science shows, no one actually has like one set learning style that is like the only way that they can learning like they’ll say you do a test and they’ll say that you’re a visual learner. But in reality, anyone can be a visual learner. So it is maybe your strength right now is that you’re a visual learner, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do the other things. So while you want to keep you using that strength, you can use that strength to develop the things that you’re really not as good at, instead of like, going to one side or the other. Yeah,

Stephanie Nelb 5:13
reminds me of a fixed mindset to like it’s putting you in a box and saying, This is who you are. And you can’t step outside of it. And you know, that’s not beneficial for anybody. Yeah, it’s really interesting.

Sarah Mae 5:27
Yeah, that’s a really good point. What do we have next?

Melissa Byone 5:31
All right, next thing, start with one. If you’re like me, I have quite a few weaknesses that I need to work on. But it’s definitely really challenging to try to work on them all at once. So starting with one and really taking the time to address it, to work on it, come up with a plan, and then really master it before moving on to the next.

Stephanie Nelb 6:04
Yeah, I like that reminds me of the

Melissa Byone 6:09
what is that quote,

Sarah Mae 6:11
The

Stephanie Nelb 6:13
it’s better to be a jack of all trades than a Master of None, one of none. But a master of oh, I’m gonna have to look it up, the full quote is really interesting. See if I can find it while we’re chatting. It was essentially something along the lines of a jack of all trades is a master of none. But that’s oftentimes better than a master of one. And I think having the focus to focus on just one at a time, allows you to build up that arsenal and be a jack of all trades more quickly, instead of trying to do everything at once, and then you’re not doing anything, or maybe you do one really well, but you’re not able to grow into the others as quickly because your focus is all over the place.

Sarah Mae 7:06
What’s your take, Sarah? Um, my take is that yeah, it’s better to start on something that you can focus on and build up from there. All right.

Melissa Byone 7:20
So that’s it. The next one I have is the is to create an action plan. So how are you going to go about addressing this weakness, basically, like, nothing will change unless you don’t put the work in. So it’s good to kind of set up that goal and then small steps towards it that are attainable. Setting dates on the way making benchmarks so you can measure your success. And then making sure that they’re small enough so that you don’t overwhelm yourself.

Sarah Mae 7:56
So making smart goals?

Melissa Byone 7:59
Yes. What are SMART goals?

Sarah Mae 8:02
Yeah, SMART goals. SMART goals are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time bound?

Melissa Byone 8:13
Yes, I don’t know about you guys. But working towards a deadline definitely helps me make sure.

Stephanie Nelb 8:21
I really liked this idea of creating an action plan. And it kind of goes back to, you know, what coaches help anybody do, you know, we’re helping them realize what goal they want to work towards and helping them see a clear outcome. And then we’re working through that action plan with them, to help them achieve it. What I also like about this is that by breaking it up into smaller chunks, it’s allowing you to see progress more quickly, which keeps building that momentum so that you want to keep going if you just have one big lofty goal, and that’s what you’re working towards, you’re probably going to fail, you know, most people do, because it’s harder to move towards this big thing that’s far in the future, instead of having those smaller wins along the way that are kind of giving you that you know, oxytocin boosts to get keep you involved and keep you going.

Melissa Byone 9:21
Alright, so the next one I have is ask questions to learn.

Sarah Mae 9:29
So,

Melissa Byone 9:31
for example, for a weakness where you lack knowledge, making sure that you’re taking the time to learn about it. Not being afraid to ask questions to those around you. Make it a habit to find out more by reading books, taking a course joining in on discussions whenever possible, basically that by learning, he’ll turn your weakness to strike Yeah,

Stephanie Nelb 10:00
Great. My current company, one of the values in the company culture is curiosity. And just making sure that you have that curiosity to just keep learning, keep asking questions, because that’s how you create great things. And it kind of again, takes me back to growth mindset, which I think is a lot of what turning weaknesses into strengths is all about. But you know, if anyone’s looking to read a book in order to learn, I would highly recommend Mindset by Carol Dweck.

Sarah Mae 10:32
Yeah, some of my favorite books. I think that it touches on like, like, what exactly is a weakness? Is it a weakness? Just because it’s not your strength? Like, how would you define what are weaknesses? I guess I

Melissa Byone 10:56
kind of see it as anything you want to work on, like anything that you think has room for improvement. chink in your, in your, in your armor.

Stephanie Nelb 11:11
Yeah, that’s interesting to think about, because you could be pretty decent at something but still want to improve. I’ll use the example that, you know, I love skiing. I’ve been doing it for 28 years now. So I’ve gotten pretty decent at it, I would say but you know, even still, there’s always room for improvement. And I’m constantly trying to look for like that new thing of, you know, how can I just push the boundaries and be just that little bit better that 1% better this year. And I think there’s a lot to be said for that.

Sarah Mae 11:46
Definitely. Like improvement kind of reminds me of the the Learning Cycle cycle sounds like a learning learning curve where you go from unconscious incompetence, you don’t know what you don’t know, the conscious incompetence. Now you know, what you don’t know, to, to conscious competence to unconscious competence. So conscious competence being like now you know, what you don’t know when you’re working on now you know, you know things and then unconscious. Competence is like mastery, you can do it without thinking. So a strength might be something where you’re unconsciously competent at it. And weakness might be something where you’re unconsciously incompetent at it.

Stephanie Nelb 12:38
Interesting,

Melissa Byone 12:39
I feel like this piece of our conversation kind of glides right into the next point, which is getting guidance from someone you trust. So when you do kind of reach that, that point where you know, but you’re not like to where you want to be, there’s someone else out there who might know. So getting guidance from them, in some situations, is might be a coach. It might be somebody who can teach you something

Sarah Mae 13:21
you face like,

Stephanie Nelb 13:23
Yeah, I mean, there’s so many coaches out there who specify and solving one unique problem because they have done it before they’ve overcome it. And now they want to help others do the same. And I think it’s also very similar to there are a lot of successful people out there that tout reading books as a way to take somebody else’s 10,000 hours and use it as if it’s their own. So for those that aren’t familiar, the concept is if you do something for 10,000 hours, then at that point, you kind of become the expert at it. And so learning from somebody else, and the 10,000 hours that they’ve spent and put into a book is a great way to kind of get that guidance and have a better idea of how to turn your weakness into a strength.

Sarah Mae 14:14
Yeah, I used to get I used to get my students before I knew that the science had evolved on learning styles used to get my students to like do a survey to figure out what their learning style was. And then I would create like a visual with people’s learning styles and what their strengths were and what their weaknesses were. So that way I could visually encourage the people who like have the strength in one area to connect with someone anyone who has like a weakness in that area so they could teach each other. So it was the same thing with finding someone who already has those strengths and and benefiting from each other.

Stephanie Nelb 15:00
So cool. Yeah, I wish I had a teacher that Yes.

Melissa Byone 15:02
That’s awesome. No, that’s, that’s the next point on my list partner up, like? Nice. Exactly exactly what you said, sometimes two brains are better than one. So finding a partner that lacks your strength and excels and your weakness is, it’s a great partnership. Yeah. Wow, that’s really cool that you did that in your classroom?

Stephanie Nelb 15:31
Yeah, that’s awesome. I think there are ways to partner up to where, you know, you might have the same weakness, like maybe it’s two people who really want to work out, but neither one of them is capable of doing it on their own, because they’re motivated by others. And, you know, not wanting to let other people down. And so that’s a situation where you could partner up and become better together.

Sarah Mae 15:54
And accountability groups. I have a group that I meet with once a month, we talk about our life goals and plans and kind of keep each other accountable and making those go forward. You can have that with anything that you’re working on or wanting to improve. Yeah,

Melissa Byone 16:16
I definitely feel that with in our collective that we do that for each other. We are that. What’s next? All right, we’re almost to the end of the list. The next one is hire out. So Whoo. Yeah, I like this one. Um, I think it’s really important to say that I firmly believe in hiring out roles and responsibilities that can save you time and money. No one is great at everything. And you don’t need to be like people are experts in their own field for a reason. So instead of taking the time to learn a new skill that you’re not passionate about, save your time, and outsource it.

Stephanie Nelb 17:15
Yeah, I love that. There’s, um, there’s a book, I’m looking for it on my bookshelf, and I don’t immediately see it, but it’s called start with who not how, and it’s a concept around, find the right people to hire for your team, whatever your team may be, or whatever it looks like, it could be, you know, needing to do household chores, and maybe it’s hiring somebody to help clean your house, but figure out who can help you solve the problem that you’re looking to solve. And just let them go do it, they’re the expert, trust them. And then you know, they will deliver the results that you’re looking for. But if you were to micromanage in how they were going to achieve that, then you might not get the results that you’re looking for.

Sarah Mae 18:07
That reminds me of the book 168 hour week, Navy read that I think I’m pretty sure it’s 160 to 100 there’s 168 hours in a week. Anyway, it’s it’s it’s essentially based on that how many hours in a week you have because because people like overestimate the amount of time in a day and underestimate the amount of time in a week and when you like take like a time log of everything you do in the way in the week you can find ways to outsource things. So if you’re spending too much time doing laundry then hire someone to do your laundry because that you get your time back that you can spend doing something else so it works for professionals. I definitely struggle with like in business not just trying to do everything myself I don’t know I don’t know what is it like not wanting to give up control or something because I enjoy doing all the things I haven’t been able to pinpoint it but it when in when in your business would you think would be an appropriate time to start to hire out aspects of your coaching business?

Melissa Byone 19:27
I think there are a few things especially like professional services. So when it comes to taxes accounting legal. I’m not messing around with that I’m hiring fresh just because the the end result is definitely worth it. Like if anything were to go wrong, then you’re protected. I think those are some really key places to start in outsourcing. What about you Steph? What do you think? Okay,

Stephanie Nelb 20:01
yeah, I think of it as, what is your time investment? So what is someone charging to, let’s say, write a blog post for you, versus what is the time it would take you to write that blog post. Now, thinking about that, having that on one side of the equation, and then on the other side thinking about what does your time cost? What else could you be doing with your time? Could you be coaching somebody, and that’s what’s actually pulling in revenue for your business. Because if so, your time is probably better spent there, instead of writing a blog post that you can hire someone else to do and still make a profit between what you’re paying this person to do it and what you got paid from your coaching. So I think that’s how I would kind of focus on it to make sure that I’m kind of getting the return on investment that I would be looking for and hiring out.

Melissa Byone 20:54
Makes sense? Yeah, yeah. That and the time it takes to learn something. I mean, yeah. Like, I’m, I’m pretty proficient in social media. And, you know, like, someone who is not might take three or four times as long to do something that would take me like, 10 minutes. So

Sarah Mae 21:20
yeah, the learning

Melissa Byone 21:21
curve definitely plays into that, too. If you’re new to something.

Sarah Mae 21:27
That’s true. I highly discourage coaches from creating their own website. Because sometimes it takes me forever to figure something out. And I’ve been creating websites for like, 20 years.

Yeah, yeah. I

Melissa Byone 21:43
mean, for sure. I mean, that totally makes sense. That’s, that’s one of those reasons why you would hire out you would outsource to, you know, someone who’s not gonna sit there and spend an hour trying to figure out how to make a button like,

Sarah Mae 21:57
yeah, my hairstylist was just saying that she spent like hours trying to figure out how to make a banner in her Wix website. I feel that I remember that learning curve of like, everything’s such a steep learning curve and coding. And even Wix, which is supposed to be relatively user experience, user friendly, has those learning curves

have anything else in there?

Melissa Byone 22:33
So the last bit is kind of a purple. So another way to think about your weaknesses is to think about your strengths. So we’ve kind of already brought this up. I’m just thinking, Okay, so let’s like do this exercise like together. So if you’re sitting there thinking about your biggest weaknesses in life, in your life right now, so I’ll list out a few. And just like, remember what your top one or two is. Okay, so here’s a list of the top 16 Typical weaknesses. So disorganized, inflexible, stubborn, inconsistent, obnoxious, emotionless, shy, irresponsible, boring, unrealistic, negative, intimidating. Weak, arrogant, indecisive, impatient. Okay, so do you have your top two? Top two? Yes.

Sarah Mae 23:45
Okay. What are they? Oh, no, I

Stephanie Nelb 23:49
just lost them. Um, one is that I’m very stubborn at times. And I’m also very impatient.

Sarah Mae 23:59
Be

Melissa Byone 24:07
there, are you going to share yours?

Sarah Mae 24:10
No. I’m also pretty stubborn. I’m sure you both know. And I can be shy as well. Think. All right, which is annoying.

Melissa Byone 24:29
Yeah. Yeah. My two would be shy and indecisive. Right. So the next part of the exercise is to look at the typical weaknesses and traits that are associated with them. So for stubborn, the typical trait that is associated with that is dedicated for shy i Typical trade is reflective. What were the other two? What were the other ones like I said,

Stephanie Nelb 25:08
so I had impatient

Melissa Byone 25:10
in, okay, impatient. Passionate, oh, being passionate. And then in this indecisive, being patient

Stephanie Nelb 25:26
sounds like we have to team up there, Melissa.

Melissa Byone 25:30
So it’s really interesting like just to look at qualities, how they kind of match up with the weakness, and that how hidden inside your weaknesses, or your strikes. So they all kind of play in together. And there’s, there’s no problem with having weaknesses. There, they’re there for a reason, because they’re tied to your greatest strengths. I think that’s good.

Stephanie Nelb 25:56
Yeah, I love that. It reminds me of a conversation I’ve had with my therapist many times around how I can be very emotional. And typically, that shows up in my body is crying. And so if I’m happy about something frustrated by something sad about something, crying is typically my go to emotion. And so I was very frustrated with that for a really long time. Um, it really bothered me, because I didn’t want to do that. But, you know, my therapist really helped me to recognize that that’s actually strength. And it’s my body telling me when something is important to me, and flipping it that way, and thinking about it in that new way, has just completely changed the way I see it, and think about it. And now I welcome those thoughts and those feelings when they come in. That’s beautiful. Thank you,

Sarah Mae 26:50
Tim. It reminds me of the fact that a lot of people don’t think like, I noticed that all of these weaknesses and strengths are related to your character. And a lot of people don’t spend a lot of time thinking about their character and how they can improve and what they what they want their character to be, and making, as you said before, a plan for improving the areas that they want to improve on. And I think that that’s a really important thing to do. I mean, there’s plenty of weaknesses that people have, that aren’t listed on here, because this is like a character list. But I think that this is, this is one of the things that it really boils down to. And I think that it needs to be spoken about more as a as a category in your life to think about not just like the traditional, like, what’s my career going to be and stuff but like, what, what type of person do I want to be?

Stephanie Nelb 27:52
Yeah, I like that.

Melissa Byone 27:56
You just picked our next podcast topic.

Sarah Mae 28:01
I think that it works really well for for coaches building their business to think about these character traits and their strengths and weaknesses. And think about the values that you hold behind those, and those values and building those values into the business that you want to build. Yeah,

Stephanie Nelb 28:24
it kind of goes back to how you want to show up in the world and how you want to help the world. And, you know, being realistic with what those values are gonna help you attract the right clients that you’re going to be really excited to help. That’s great. Well, Melissa, thank you for sharing this article with us. And anyone who wants to check out their own weaknesses should go read the blog post on our website. That’s Life Coach collective.com.

Sarah Mae 28:59
Yeah. Thanks for tuning in.

Stephanie Nelb 29:03
Until next time that’s right

 

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Episode Resources

Book Recommendation: Strengthsfinder 2.0 by Tom Rath